A Special Message

Many of you have mentioned the book "Coming to Term" as a must-read for recurrent miscarriers. I happened upon the book at the library when I was searching for reading material after my third miscarriage.  Considering that the library isn't very well-funded and that the selection of reading material for miscarriage was fairly slim, I consider it as close to kismet as one can get that I found that book at the time that I did.

This book was informative, well-written and, above all, thorough. After reading it, I felt comfortable with the lay of the RSA land and knew which steps I needed to take next.  It was a lifesaver and I wanted to thank the author, Jim Cohen, for his gift.

So I wrote him and email and he wrote me back with wonderful words of encouragement. Here is our exchange for those of you who might take comfort in his words as I did :

Mr Cohen,

I have never written to an author or artist regarding the positive influence they have had on my life. I've thought of it often, but never followed through.

This time I feel so compelled because your book, Coming to Term, offered me a lifeline in a chaotic sea. I want to offer you a sincere "Thank You" for writing this informative book; it has and will play a very large role in the myriad upcoming decisions I have yet to make (which therapies to attempt, which are unproven, what tests I should take, and even whether I want to try again). 

I have had 3 recurrent miscarriages, the last one explained by a Triploidy. 

I gather that not much new informarmation is known 5 years later regarding some of the contentious procedures or the procedures that were in their infancy at that time.  Is that correct?  Have you followed any of the new developments. 

Thank you again. 

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Hi Melanie,

I wrote the book for people like you. I'm so glad to know the words landed in the right place.


No, I haven't learned anything new in the past five years that fundamentally has altered anything I wrote in the book. I think the main message for someone in your shoes still is loud and clear: If you have the desire and the emotional ability to keep trying, your odds are good that if you do get pregnant again (assuming you're under, say, 45, and there's no identifiable underlying problem) you will carry to term. Young humans miscarry a lot. And we miscarry a tremendous amount as we age. That said, we're not pandas: We can breed all year long, so we have repeated chances to become pregnant.


Again, thanks so much for writing, and best of luck, whatever you choose.


Jon